Today’s webinar blew it up for me. Blew what up? Me. I got I have been focusing on money in exchange for my life coaching, when the whole time the way I was focusing on it just didn’t sit right. Why? Everyone is worthy of their hire to paraphrase St. Paul. And I am a good coach, a really good coach. I have seen people get their IT because of our work together. Yet every time I start to make the work about payment it gets stuck for me. And then I wonder if it is just me, some aversion to doing good works for money, some making meaning over money that is less than honorable. My pat answer for years has been, “I come from a long line of Methodist ministers.” – And then, when I got over the “money is dirty” issue, I made my lack of paying clients about fear of rejection. Is that it really? Then today, in the webinar, the content covered moved me to tears throughout the session and gave me chills repeatedly – the kinds of chills that make the hair on your arms stand up.
I work in a business currently that is very social work oriented. We have our entrepreneur side of the business, but the side of the business I am in, career development planning for predominantly disadvantaged people in poverty, entails a great deal of social work components. Every assessment I have ever done on my personality type and interests puts social work way down low on the totem pole. Yet look at what I do today.
The things in life that light me up are writing, reading, the arts, theatre, color, texture, words in motion, words that put people in motion. In fact, it is those things that actually got me into the business I am in today. A degree in theatre led to mime school where I met my first ever deaf signing person. It was love at first sight – words in motion. I was fascinated that motion could be systematized into linguistic structure. I learned the language, followed my then bliss, became an interpreter for the deaf, and the rest with many twists and turns is history.
I love words. In my various DMP versions, a huge part of my DMP is writing, writing that causes breakthroughs for people. I wrote too that my writing would cause people to want me to coach them. I believe that is true still. I do want my writing to be so meaningful to someone that they would want something different and better in their life than what they have had and that they want me to partner with them so they make it happen.
What I am clear about now is I have put dollar amounts on my coaching in the past not because I think it must be so but to please someone else. I got today that I CAN GIVE IT AWAY if I want to…I can Coach. I can Heal. I can charge for it or NOT! What I really want most in life is to have days like today and Friday – open, free. Freedom of thought and movement, windows thrown open, doors thrown open, minds thrown open. Time. Time to be with those I love – my family, with friends, creating hospitality and a place for them to be themselves, to be in love with living, exchanging ideas, dreams, details.
Why did I do 2 1/2 years of coaching school and certifications? For the joy of digging in and to uncover who I really AM. Now, with this course, I feel like I am living anew the best of what I learned in my training and learning new things I never knew I could believe in. I am now learning new habits to make the best of what I learned, what I know deep down in the silver thread of myself, stick. And I am seeing many things for the first time. I am owning, finally owning, for the first time that I want to write; Love to write. And if I never coach anyone that is ok, and if I do that is ok. In fact, I want to coach and give the same freedom to others that I am receiving. So yes, I want to coach. And yes, I want to receive World Class dollars per year per client, and I also want to give it away. And I want to write and create book deals and a wonderful stream of income. And I want to GIVE It AWAY too. Both/and. “I can be what I will to be.” I am in the “Free Fall of my own Adventure.” Can’t wait to see what is next.