So I found myself annoyed with my husband for telling me how to ladle soup out of a pot on the stove…Why in the world does he always assume I am going to make a mess and try to tell me how to do it! Am thinking about this as I leave to drive to the store, all the while mulling over Session 2 from MKMMA.(Wow, that surely was interpretation!)
We had to select two things that really are at the heart of ourselves, our personal pivotal need. In the writing process which I really enjoyed we ultimately selected our heart’s burning desire…mine were autonomy and recognition for creative expression. I had wondered if I had selected “right”…and then it hit me, just as if I had a splash of water in the face.
Of course I am ruffled by his always seemiingly in my stuff…Autonomy, other words for it are self-governing, independence, self-rule…that is the inner me…and I am so conditioned to care about what other people think! I want autonomy, even how I ladle my soup! I laughed out loud. Hahahahah! I get so annoyed…it is like a reflex. I do not have to react that way at all. I can be self-governing, independent, acknowledge his assistance, even thank him, and not care a whit! I can choose to feel completely differently about it.
I can choose to feel completely differently about a lot of things. I can experience my autonomy, my self-governance, independence, sense of personal sovereignty in many ways. I can choose to feel all of it. As I sit here, writing synonyms, I feel this expansive warmth and sense of peace. What you think of me is none of my business. What I think of me…that is the heart of it. Really.